Find Your Spouse on Tinder
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You know that guy who walks around with a backpack full of crystals? The type that has invested all his efforts in the new gold; spirituality?
He might be sickeningly annoying when showing off his progress in Dragon Breathing, and he can quite positively come off as repulsive the way he looks at everyone, all the time, as if they are an LSD infused multi-dimensional disturbance between the first human being he has ever seen, and his first real crush in high school. He might even provoke an unsettling feeling of jealousy and suspiciousness, the way every situation he finds himself in seem to have already been played out in one of his numerous, and repeatedly communicated, self-fulfilling, prophetic dreams. But one thing you feel you can’t take away from him, is that perhaps he is right.
The Playboy Mirage
Hugh Hefner reincarnated is a yoga teacher, and the new Playboy runs studios, not clubs or sets. His magazine is his instagram account, and his bunnies wear breathing tights, not suffocating bodysuits. Their rabbit ears are still pointing stiff, listening attentively to any change in vibration. Any divine adjustment to the flow of energy. Any new word or phrase channeling through their master, then released over deep waves of humming, coming from his exposed chest and pushed through the air, and profoundly absorbed and echoed in their celestial temples of pleasure and creation.
The Playboy and his Bunnies still photograph together. The red carpets and sponsored backdrops have given way for dreamcatchers and waterfalls. The choreography has taken monumental leaps, from stiff suits, drunken stares and loose smiles, to human sculpturing and demanding acrobatics. Skipping the party of red carpets and cocktail dresses altogether, and jumping straight to the forced happy exercise the day-after, with sport bras, stressed muscular stares, and vegan smiles.
You see your spouse doing a frozen helicopter pose in front of a mirror fenced by a city wall of lit candlelights. She hovers like a rocket packed Apache in the Gulf, tactically positioned out of reach of your miserable attempts at mapping and explaining your emotional landscape, but well within grabbing distance for her yogi’s strong grip. Thick smoke from incense fill the air in the horizon.
His palms are supporting her pelvis, fingers stretched around her hips. You have been wondering for a while now if she is finding more fulfillment outside from underneath your debt heavy townhouse roof. Several times a day you have found yourself questioning if she could be having an affair, that you might be able to find your spouse on Tinder, that she might be out seeking satisfaction you haven’t been able to provide lately, and you’ve started asking things like how can i find my spouse on Tinder? And wondering how to find my spouse on dating sites, if you had the ability
The picture is liked 237 times, and 32 people have taken their time to comment. “No mamesté!” is the top one. 18 people have liked the comment itself. Followed by 7 more comments underneath. Their reactions are for the most part portrayed through a child’s game of slightly varying round yellow faces covered in hearts or tears of laughter. The few people using actual words are writing in a confused form of HindiSpanglish, every sentence ending with a rain of star bursting blessings, unconditional two-week old love, and ground shaking gratefulness.
Not Always Obvious
The new crowd of outspoken digital free flowing friends of stardust, united in their love of commitment issues, human contact and fashionable wanderlust, seems to have gathered in size and significance after the girlfriend trip she took to Tulum, Mexico three months back. First thoughts? Why the candles right, when they already have all the lights on? Well that’s your first mistake in this new game of self-love and sexual energy. Rule number one: Always bring candles. Second thought? You couldn’t hold that pose if your life depended on it. You are starting to realize that she is developing on a journey you chose to sit out, and there might not be any tickets left in the counter actions.
Her social media profiles are too open and obvious for you to have any real fear of her being with any of her commentators. But she could have chosen a more secretive approach. You have heard about this rising phenomenon too many times now not to take it seriously. She might have given you signals you never took your time to translate and understand. She might have opened up for conversations you left hanging on your way out the door. So what do married people do when searching for affairs? Are they on Tinder? Your curiousness is boiling over. So how to find spouse on Tinder?
You don’t know how to confront her about it. But you need an anonymous way to clear your anxious mind. An answer to how to find out if my partner is cheating that doesn’t include discussion or misinterpretations. You need to know how to find out if your spouse is on Tinder without any doubts or cloudy answers. So you use Cheaterbuster, formerly Swipe Buster. An online search engine that will give you all the answers you need within minutes.
Here’s how to find out if my partner is on Tinder.
Step one: Start the tinder search by name. You must provide the exact first name as it appears on facebook of the one the person you are searching for.
Step two: You must provide the age of the person. If you happen to be insecure of the exact age, you can write your closest guess.
Step three: Use the map and provide the last location you believe the person used tinder.
Step four: Enter your email to receive the tinder profile search results from Cheaterbuster. Based on the users search criteria and a number of other variables, results are typically delivered within three minutes.
For 8 bucks and five minutes effort you can buy yourself some peace of mind with the ability to find your spouse on Tinder. If you find yourself wondering at night – is he on Tinder? Is she on Tinder? – then it may be time to give Cheaterbuster’s tinder profile search a try!